Introduction

Focus

Coherence

Audience

Development

Style/Mechanics

Organization

Purpose

Prioritizing Criteria

Exercises

Additional Resources


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Authors & Contributors

Example Focus Sentences

This handout illustrates the importance of establishing a focus in topic sentences and thesis statements. You can also use it as an overhead.

Unfocused: Too many people treat animals badly in experiments.

Focused: The cosmetic industry often harms animals in unnecessary experiments designed to test their products.

Unfocused: Grades are an unfair pain in the neck.

Focused: Course grades based solely on one term paper don't accurately measure a student's knowledge on a subject.

Unfocused: Getting the right job is important and can lead to rewarding experiences.

Focused: Getting the right job can lead to an improved sense of self-esteem.

Unfocused: The Fourth of July picnic was a big success.

Focused: Everyone at the Fourth of July picnic ate well, enjoyed the swimming pool, and had a chance to chat with old friends.